Defining Home

Gaurav Ojha

I think of home as a place where we desire to belong. It is a place that keeps on pulling us back with memories of warmth, safety, trust and comfort. Therefore, home is something we can never forget and leave behind. Besides, the real charm of remembering a home is that even after the concreteness of home crumbles and fades away, something remains and survives within us as a concept of home. Hence, remembering a home is something like returning back and finding yourself in a place that defines you but in the place you have already left.
Paradox here is that we can never go back the home we remember with same beauty and magic once we have grown out of it. As a consequence, a sense of loss haunts us from within that perhaps we may never find that place again with all the necessary relationships that once made our life meaningful and complete.
After all, home doesn’t feel same when some of its members take a leave or move away, home turns empty when some people are no longer in it. In an abstract sense, home is about people and relationships. That’s why many of us feel a sense of separation with home when our relationships doesn’t work out, turn loveless and ends.
Similarly, in a globalised world, many people also feel that the country of our origin doesn’t feel like a home any more. Therefore, home is also a place you are trying to escape because simply being rooted in a single place also entails that you have not made it in your life. Likewise, as a bitter reality, some of us have toxic parents who don’t acknowledge the dreams, aspirations, freedoms, talents and inner calling of their children. These parents want to reframe their children as the prisoners of their own dreams. Thus, by escaping home, we also end up finding it again.
Moreover, I feel that home is also a place we are forced out of and encouraged to leave. After all, without leaving, home loses it meaning of growth, support, achievement and maturity. Home is not just a place of shelter and safety, it is also a place that reminds you to take a risk because even if you can’t make it in our life, home is a place that reassures and you can always return back to its comfort and safety.
Finally, we can find home in the shapes of our memories, in our sense of identity, therefore whether it is in the country of your origin or in an unfamiliar town in some corner of the world, the home that we find or build in anywhere is always the home we carry within ourselves. After all, home is in our hearts and minds, in our bitter sweet memories of those places and faces with whom we truly belong.


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